Post eHouseman 2016 Angst

It is precisely 12 hours ago that I picked my housemanship placement via ehouseman website and oh boy, the sheer panic and anger it caused me is something that will haunt me for the next two years of my life when I start being a houseman next month.

So it started, as stated in the homepage, that the system would be online at 12 pm sharp. I was in front of my laptop from 11.30 am, furiously typing my username (IC number) and password over and over again and met with a message that said the system is not yet online. Came 12 o'clock and I logged in my details only to encounter the system to be hanged. The website lagged so much I had an epiphany that I would face something disastrous as I proceed.

Before I share my horrible experience with the ehouseman, there are a number of new things in regard to this time's housemanship placement that you should know:

1. The housemanship placement is a contract-based offer.
2. eHouseman is the next course of action after you successfully passed your SPA interview.
3. During the ehouseman, once we chose the hospital for the housemanship placement, an official offer letter from SPA will be self-generated for us to print out.
4. As the SPA offer letter only come AFTER we filled up the ehouseman, there is no need to enter No. Rujukan SPA since duh, you won't get one at the moment.
5. No more unnecessary family details to key in - they just asked how many siblings you've got, and make sure you enter your nationality. 
6. Then when you move on to Education details, they only asked qualifications apart from your SPM and medical degree - IB, A levels, etc. Make sure to remember the year of your qualification.

Then comes to the crux of the matter - the placement part. This is where I lost my shit.

First problem: My number 1 hospital in my wishlist is not there. That's a huge bummer. It means the hospital has no houseman vacancy at all. It's alright. Didn't I have a second choice then? I quickly select PERAK and I saw Ipoh has 32 placement.

That brought me to the second problem; Data Sending Error. When I had confirmed that I want Ipoh and all, I clicked the Hantar button and after a few antagonizing moments, it came back with an error sending the information. I had to refresh.

Third problem: Couldn't logged in.

This thing happened after I refreshed the browser. It kept showing me an error page, saying that the page failed to load. I've wasted valuable 10 minutes trying to go back to the ehouseman homepage. I felt like crying. I cursed very loudly, screaming into the cushion that I stuffed my face into, and in front of my increasingly worried mom, too. I was very agitated and snappy, and at that moment I felt I was truly unlucky.

When I finally got it, it was already 12.20 pm. I went back to Placement part and saw there's only 5 placement for Ipoh. I tried again. And it was busted. Again I am met with the error page, and by that time I already gave up. I nearly wanted to throw my laptop across the living room. I was so crushed.

I tried again, and again, and there's only Taiping left. My mom asked me take it, but I hesitated. I don't know anything about Taiping, and that was when I made a mistake of clicking a different state to see what other options I have. The system went hanged again, and I have no other choice but to hit the refresh button. I tried again, until finally the option PERAK disappeared completely from the option list. I felt on the verge of tears. I was so dismayed the two only options I had in mind went kaput.

I clicked on SEMUA NEGERI and I saw HKL has over 200 placement and the hospital that I ended up choosing has over 80 placement. I know from the numbers still available these two are the last hospitals they want to avoid going to but I had no choice. I had to put my faith in this one particular unknown hospital and finally, I got the placement.

After the system confirmed that I got the hospital that I picked myself (yeah right you fucking third-world-country fucking shitty system), there are four documents for me to print out. The offer letter, the surat setuju terima lantikan, syarat-syarat pelantikan secara kontrak document, the guide to fill up the borang perjanjian, the document checklist, and the borang perjanjian itself. I haven't check yet all these documents and what to prepare because today is such an exhausting day for me emotionally. 

It's not going to help that I would be alone in that hospital. Added to the fact I read in the blog somewhere in the Internet that that hospital is the second busiest hospital in Malaysia. That my senior said, in his disbelieved tone or amazement at my foolishness, that the hospital is even busier than HSA, which I already hate it with all my heart. 

So here it is, one shitty system coupled with one lousy decision making that lead me to all this. Maybe Allah wants it to be this way. Maybe this is where I should be. It's hard to berlapang dada and be at peace with the cards that have been dealt for you, especially when you are bad with poker face and you suck at losing.